Who should pay? I come from a culture which has changed slowly over the years and I want to discuss more about it since nowadays people go from self-reliance to dependent on someone.
What am saying here are my own views and opinions which some might disagree with, for most of us are brought up in different cultures and we may not see it this way.
I was always taught to meet my own expenses, therefore whenever am with a family member, we both share the costs or the person who does the invitation pays for the meal. If it is someone different we have to insist paying for the meal until a tug of war starts.
The town I live in does not apply such where one should pay their own or offer to pay. They always expect you who looks rich to pay all their expenses. Basically, it is always the male who should pay or a female foreigner.
People do not see that an individual has their own hardships, he/she has a house loan, travelling expenses, accommodation expenses, meal expenses, family to support overseas etc… in Solomon Islands.
Why are we paying school fees also for someone else’s children? Phew! I am starting to think I was the one having sex and expenses followed. Young people these days do not help parents to pay bills or support them. You will see old people still working hard, not retired, while their children still enjoy life or children rely on parents heavily to put food on the table.
Is there a limit? Am going to start meeting my own expenses, help my parents, be more caring and do for them what they did for me.
I think who should pay comes with the following:
- paying respect and gratitude for others
- support to those who helped you
- saying thank you for knowledge given during a meet up
- showing love and kindness
We always know if we are taken advantage of if:
- the person did not give much insight to what you require
- appreciation does not go both ways
- no effort and contributions
Obviously the other person is full of crap.
If I go on a date, yeah right! or sit with someone, I will be willing to pay if that person treats me with kindness and is very open.
If I sit with someone who looks down on me and judge me from my appearance, I will still be willing to pay for him/her because enough effort was given to meet me.
If I sit with someone whom I understand completely to be in one of those horror films, then I will insist to pay, tug of war happens once, I shifted the bill to him/her. Horror continues.
Equality is when females stop relying on males to pay.
Equality is when females stop assuming all males should pay.
Just be always ready to pay though.